


Take it Back to the Beginning

by Ladystiltskin67



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Jack Kline Lives, Post-Season/Series 14, SPN - Freeform, Season 14 Coda, Season 14 Speculation, Season/Series 14 Spoilers, Supernatural - Freeform, The Empty, season 14, that was gabe in the empty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-02-10 14:33:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18662317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ladystiltskin67/pseuds/Ladystiltskin67





	1. Chapter 1

## Back at the bunker Dean watched what was left of his family drag their bloodied beaten bodies inside.

He sat motionless for a moment just feeling the pain. Everything stung and ached. He definitely felt his age. He contemplated going inside and standing under the hottest water he could stand, but the weight of what was waiting for him held him off. If he went in he’d have to see them, their tear streaked faces, and know he was to blame. If he hadn’t been so intent on killing the boy….

 _ **Jack**_ , his brain reminds him.  _He has a name_

Jack is still in the trunk. Escaping the hell God left them in was hard enough that he almost didn’t go back. One look at Cas and he changed his mind. Dean took a deep breath, waived off his companions, and trudged back through the graveyard to retrieve the body of what once held the Nephilim.

_He wasn’t a just a Nephilim Dean, he was Castiel’s son… **your**  son. Your son that you were going to murder._

Dean shook off the offending thoughts running through his head. He loved Jack. He was just doing the smart thing and not the heart thing. They’d made that mistake one too many times.

_That doesn’t make it right._

Dean fled the drivers seat hoping movement would quiet his head. Stupidly, he went to the back of the car and popped the trunk. It took only seconds for every wrong thing he’d ever done to flood his memory. Every deal, every sacrifice, all the lives he lost because he chose Sammy, Bobby, Cas over the greater good. The guilt was crushing but he could handle it knowing that he’d saved them. But he hadn’t not really.

He felt like a joke. The worst part of it? This whole time he thought he’d been executing free will, in reality he was nothing more than a puppet. One of Chuck’s play things. Powerless. No matter what, he’d screwed up. The Devil’s words in his little brothers voice rang in his ears.

“Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up…here.”

Tears stung his eyes as he tried to swallow down the bile rising in his throat.

“Dean.” He flinched and looked up at the sound of his voice to find his brother standing at the hood of the car.

“I figured we should…Before…”

“Where’s Cas?”

“He’s inside.”    

“We should…. When he’s ready.” Dean knew the angel had no desire to see him, much less speak to him. “Why don’t you go see what he wants to do?”

Dean watched as Sam turned and walked out of the garage. He leaned forward and brushed the hair away from Jack’s pale face. Looking at him like this was too much. The most vibrant things about Jack we’re his eyes. There was always an expression to be seen. The joy at levitating a pencil or the pain of his first tattoo.

“I’m so sorry kid…” 

“Sorry for what Dean-o?”

The hair on his neck stood up at the familiar voice and as he turned Dean locked his sight onto the bright hazel eyes he was sure he’d never see again.

“Gabriel?”


	2. Chapter 2

“Gabriel?”

“In the flesh.”

Dean tilted his head slightly to analyze what he was seeing. Remembering Jack’s body lay just behind him, he turned quickly to close the trunk only to realize it was empty. As his thoughts were forming he heard a voice he’d never quite get use to.

“Looking for something?” Dean turned back to face the beautiful, yet terrifying, embodiment of Death.

“What’d you do with him Billie?” He’d already gotten the boy killed… It would be hard to explain to Cas that he’d lost the body as well.

The two glared at one another as the sound of footsteps filled the garage.

“Hey, Cas said if you wouldn’t mind to -” Sam froze mid sentence as he took in the scene before him. There’s no way he was seeing what he was seeing. He lumped it up to blood loss. That is, until he heard the other man speak.

“Hey there Sam.” Gabriel made a small flourish with his arms as his face held a small smile. Sam looked to Dean to validate then back to the smaller man in front of him. A quick assessment told Sam that it wouldn’t take more than three strides, but he also noticed they had company so he settled for a small acknowledgement.

“H, Hey Gabriel.” Sam cleared his throat then addressed the other person in the room. “Hi Billie.”

“Sam. Where’s the angel? I have a feeling he’ll want to be here for this.”

“Be here for what?” Dean questioned. When billy didn’t answer Dean rolled his eyes then closed them sending a silent message to the man inside. It wasn’t long before they could hear another set of heavy feet coming their way.

“Dean, are you ok? Something feels off. There’s -” Castiel stood next to the brothers for only a moment before he moved forward to envelop his brother in a hug.

“Brother… I, Where have you been?” Cas smiled into Gabriel’s shoulder before pulling back.

“Well, I had been hanging out in the empty, but this beautiful creature sprung me.” Gabriel hitched a thumb at Billie. “Anywho, we picked up a little hitchhiker, said he knew you guys.”

It took only seconds as a shimmer in front of them turned first into a silhouette, then a person.

“Jack…”

“Castiel!” The young man moved forward into the angels arms.

“Jack, I’m, I- I’m so glad you’re home.” Castiel held tight as he could without hurting his son and they separated only long enough for Sam to have his turn. Thankfully Billie spoke just in time to keep Jack and Dean from facing one another.

“If we’re doing getting re-introduced here, I have a few things I need to take care of. Rest as much as you can now, because starting tomorrow, the five of you get to help me put the world back together.” She looked at Dean expecting a fight and got a simple nod instead.

“Well, lets get cleaned up and filled up. I ain’t saving the world on an empty stomach.” Dean new he probably couldn’t eat even if he did want to, but cooking would be a welcome distraction. The group murmured their agreements and headed toward the kitchen.  He watched again as what was left of his family walked back into the bunker without him.

“A little sad isn’t it?” Death folded her arms leaning back against a car.

“What, the end of the world?”

“No, just how they’re together in there. The archangel with your brother, the nephilim with your… friend, and you out here. Alone.”

“Aww now Billie don’t be silly. I’m not alone, I’m out here with you.” Dean smiled sweetly at her.

“Hmmm not for long. Get some rest Dean. You need it.”

The battle worn hunter wandered through the halls reaching his bedroom. Billie was right. He was alone. His family sat in the war room trading stories and reconnecting while he hid himself away. It’s because your a coward

“Stop it.” He felt defeated. His body was sore, his ego demolished, and to top it off he was covered in zombie guts. Gathering what little bit of strength he had left Dean trudged to the bathroom to shower. He wanted to take his time and let the heat of the water loosen his strained muscles, but that would require standing longer than he had the patients for tonight. Scrubbing quickly he realized he’d need a second go. This time he used some of Sam’s fancy soap. It smelled better than his plain bar of irish spring, and it made his skin soft.

Back in his room Dean toweled off opting for sweats and a t-shirt over the one pair of actual pajamas he had. Once dressed he fell face first onto the bed and fast asleep.

***

“Dean. Dean honey, wake up.”

“Ugh…mm.”

“Dean? Come on, get up.”

“Just a few more minutes Mom.” Can’t a man get some sleep… my own mother- Wait.

“Mom?!” Dean shot up in bed noticing the blonde woman at his feet.

“Hi sweetheart.” Mary smiled softly at her son.

“Mom is that really you?”

“It’s me. Now, don’t get too excited. I’m just here for a visit, but I wanted to talk to you.”

“You have to go back?” Tears began to cloud his vision.

“Yes.”

“What’d you wanna say?”

“I know you’re holding on. I know you’re still angry at him, but Dean-”

“Of course I’m angry at him… He-” Her oldest son gestured to her in an attempt to convey the feeling building in his chest.

“I know what he did Dean, but It was an accident. I knew better and I pushed him too far.”

“You think that this is your fault?” Mary scooted closer to her eldest son.

“I’m not here to lay blame to anyone. He and I both overreacted and-” Dean cut her off in a surge of anger.

“Overreacted? Yelling at you would have been an over reaction! Pushing you down would have been an overreaction. He didn’t overreact mom, he blew you up! He more than blew you up, he, he, disintegrated you. We couldn’t even… There was nothing left.”  Mary took his hands in hers to try and calm him.

“I know. And I am sorry.” Mary paused waiting for her son to look at her. “Dean, you and I both know that I didn’t belong here. When I came back I was out of place. I wasn’t the mother you were expecting, the one you deserved. You or Sam.”

“That doesn’t mean you deserved…. That.”

“I know it seemed horrific to you, but I was ok. I was arguing with Jack and then in the same second I was home. Next thing I know your father came bounding through the door. It’s been peaceful.”

“Mom…”

“I know it’s hard. But you’re going to have to trust me on this. Dean I am so sorry that you had to live the life you did. You and Sam both. But do you have any idea how proud I am to go down as the woman who mothered the two most incredible men in the universe?” Dean smiled slightly at the compliment. “You’re about to face the biggest fight of your life. I need you to let the anger go. I’m at peace where I am, and I am content to waste my days with your father until you and Sam can join us.”

“I don’t know if I can do it. I don’t know if I can do any of this.” He let the tears fall as his mother reached out to hold him. Dean held tight knowing it was the last hug he’d get for a while. He relaxed as a lullaby from the past soothed his tired soul in his mother’s soft voice.

“And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain….Don’t carry the world upon your shoulders.

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah…. Hey Jude….”

***


End file.
